The Hardest race of my life...IM Cairns

I have finally come to terms with what happened on Sunday at Ironman Cairns.

It's possibly one of the hardest moments in an athletes career to be forced to have to stop whilst having the race of their lives! Here is a brief run down of what happened;

The swim I lead out feeling fantastic in my TYR freak!I was relaxed and exited over 4minutes in front of the next group of Belinda and Carrie  and less than 2min behind men's pack of Bell,Brown and Macca! Onto the amazing Trek Speed Concept and felt so strong and fit.

I was completely solo for the whole 180km, feeling very good and led off the bike in 8th place overall,over 5minutes ahead of the next female pro. Onto the run and I felt good and knew all I needed was a solid run to win the race comfortably.The run is my forte and I was so excited doing the maths realizing I only needed a 3:26run to win ...easy I thought, how wrong i was! About 3/4km into the run my right calf was getting so tight and started to feel like it was pulling.I stopped and walked putting ice on it hoping it was only a cramp. Knowing it really was alot worse, as everytime I went to run it just pulled even more!

So I half  jog walked to 7km until it even hurt to walk.It was then I realized it was very this is serious,' this isnt going away this isnt a cramp!' A medic followed me watching, I asked if we could try stopping to tape it, he said he would try. Immediatly pulled I to the side of the road. I told the doctor "quick quicK lets try taping it.'' He seemed more concerned than I wanted him to be and upon touching my soleus I screamed, realising this wasnt just a small cramp or strain this was a tear.

The medic informed me that if i continued I would make it a lot worse and further tear the muscle thus a lot longer recovery. So many things entered my head, "why me, why now, why when im winning and feeling so good". I knew one thing though - the season is long, I needed to finish and call it a day right there and then.

Tears welled as I came to the realisation that I wasn't going to win and I wasn't going to deliver my mum the perfect birthday present. It just wasnt my day. 2nd place Belinda Harper passed and I cheered her on, hoping for a good day for my other competitors too in including Belinda and Carrie!

That day there was nothing  I could have done to change what happened I had perfected the race until that point and executed a perfect two legs like I had planned. This was somehitng I knew I could take away from the race despite the huge disappointment.

I am totally grateful and also humbled by the reaction of other pro women like Bel Granger and deserving winner Carrie Lester. I want to thank them for the well wishes and for their amazing sportsmanlike attitudes towards me.

I'm still pretty devastated as I lost money and points for Hawaii both I would really have liked! My plan is to get better fast and then to do a good points race, once my leg is better in order to qualify and then continue preparing for hawaii.

Really sorry to disappoint and please know I will be back ASAP! I know yesterday i showed myself my training with Siri is working with a much faster swim and bike than last year! I can't wait to be able to race again soon!